‘Twas the Night Before Signing Day

‘Twas the night before signing day
And all through the Big House
not a recruit was stirring,
not even a mouse.
The rankings were posted on the internet with care,
in hopes that Rashan Gary soon would be there.
The fans were nestled all snug in their beds,
while hopes of championships danced in their heads.
With Coach in his khakis and I in my cap,
had just settled our brains for a quick #crootin nap.
When out on the 50 arose such a clatter,
I sprang from 247 to see what’s the matter!
Away to ESPNU I flew like a tailback,
turned on the TV, and grabbed all my snacks;
Team 137, to the best of my reason,
gave a much-needed luster to this dreary offseason,
when, my wondering eyes see absolute,
a wonderful class and its 30 recruits,
with a fearless driver with vigor and vim,
I knew in a moment, it must be Coach Jim.

More rapid than Buckeyes his players they came,
and he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:
“Now! Walker, now! Peters, now! Crawford and Johnson,
“On! Dwumfour, on! Evans, on! Mitchell and Hudson;
“To the top of the conf’rence, ‘The Team’ on the wall!
“Now sign away, sign away, sign away all!”

So up to the top of the country they flew,
With Team 137, and Coach Jim, too:
And then with an inkling, though I don’t have proof,
The chasing and signing of a really big hoof.
As I drew in my head and was turning around,
the top class in the nation with Gary inbound!
Dressed in maize and blue, from his head to his foot,
Clemson clothes tarnished and covered with soot.

A bundle of family and all of his peers,
Look’d just like a Michigan Man, starting his career;
Our eyes, how they twinkled! His pass rush, how merry,
His hands were like a blur, quarterbacks he’d bury.
Lavert Hill’s LOI faxed in with a bow,
a cornerback and pass defense you already know.
The great Connor Murphy and his shiny red hair,
and if we land Quinn Nordin, it just wouldn’t seem fair.
“Will the California twins join us?” my roommate, he cried,
I hoped and I wished, for I know the coaching staff tried.
Sleeping over, going to class, and climbing tall trees,
Coach Jim assembled the best, he did it with ease.

A wink of an eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me know I have nothing to dread.
He spoke cryptic word while at his work,
tweeting and dabbing to quiet the jerks,
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And gave up a nod, to Hill Auditorium he rose.

He sprung to practice with his black Sharpie pen,
And away they all flew, growing from boys into men.
But I heard him exclaim, as he ran out of sight –

“Happy Signing Day to all, and to all a good night.”


Bill Getschman